zippypinhead1

I hope that you find what you are looking for in this life. This Vale of Darkness. I hope you find what you were looking for and that you don’t come out of it empty-handed. Empty handed and bereft of…

First you get to be born and then the next thing is they feed you into the Mill. They shove you into the intake port so the grappling hooks can grab hold of you and suck you in. Then you…

I was cranky in myself because the bad thing was happening, cranky because all the bad things were happening again. I was as cranky as hell. Super-cranky. ‘Will we never get a break from this bullshit?’ I complained, full of…

I had the sudden instinct to lose myself in the sprawling, seething metropolis. “Quick”, I urged myself, “lose yourself in the sprawling, seething metropolis…”   That was pure instinct, that was. Pure, raw instinct – no thinking required! No university…

I have a handy household ego which I keep in an old shoe box under my bed. It says things like “Put the kettle on, would you?” and “Did you remember to put the cat out?” It asks people how…

Once – and this is a true story by the way – on a mad whim, I conjured up a powerful magical genie and gave him the task of constantly praising me, praising me no matter what I did. Good,…

Belligerently disregarding the incalculable blessing that had been bestowed upon me, I launched myself into a life of callous brutality and heartless avarice. You know how it goes, right? I’m sure I don’t have to pontificate any further with regard…

I was trained to be stupid every step of the way. Trained by experts. Trained by the best. ‘Trained by the very best’ – isn’t that what they say? How can you possibly go wrong then, you see? How can…

‘I am always right about everything’, I tell myself solemnly. ‘I already know everything, without even trying’. ‘This is very important’, says I to myself – ‘I’m obviously destined to do something with this gift. The world needs me…’ The…

‘Special moments’, says I to myself, ‘special moments in which you realise that you are in fact the Chosen One’. Special moments like these are so very special you see, they are so very wonderfully special. I can’t even begin…