Pear-shaped Psychology

Do you know that thing where you identify with a random psychological ego and then the next thing is that you’re rabbiting on about goals and targets and realising your dreams and all that kind of stuff and you’re full of all these crappy opinions about this, that in the other and you’re mouthing off about how you think this and how you think that and you expect everyone to be interested in the asinine nonsense you keep coming out with and you’re enthusiastic about doing the self-affirmations to validate your crappy old ego and about valuing yourself and not thinking self-critical thoughts about what a sad lame-ass you are and, if necessary, you’re prepared to utilise CBT to correct all the pernicious thinking errors that threaten to erode the integrity of the ridiculous ego construct you have unwisely identified with. I think we all know that thing – it is a very basic thing, after all. It’s a very basic thing indeed. How basic could a thing be, for God’s sake? You can’t get more basic than that, you just can’t. So you know that thing right? You can’t pretend that you don’t – no one can pretend that they don’t know that thing! That’s the point that I’m trying to make here. That’s the point that I’d like us all to be able to agree upon. It’s not too much to ask, is it? Let’s all just bloody agree that we know that thing – that thing where you have identified very firmly with a random psychological ego and you’re raving like a complete obsessive fool about goal-setting and the importance of positive thinking and effective visualisation techniques and strategies for actualising your potential and you’re doing the self-affirmations and it’s all good, and you’re practising the NLP techniques and you’re attending all the workshops and all the seminars and all that kind of shit and you are grateful for all the positive things in your life and it’s all going great and everything is good. So YES you know that thing – we all know that thing – and then the next thing is that it all starts to go pear-shaped on you and before you even know what’s happening the whole damn thing starts to go to shit in front of your very eyes… You know what a bitch that is, obviously! I mean I don’t have to tell you what a bitch that is, do I? We all know that, we all know that so well. It’s all going to shit as you watch and you’re visualising the successful outcomes and you’re correcting the thinking errors and you are challenging the catastrophizing and the black-and-white thinking and all of that kind of thing and it’s all going to shit right in front of your eyes, it’s all going to shit as you watch and that’s because of the thinking errors that have crept in without you realizing it. Your thoughts are telling you that there is an error in your thinking there’s an error that’s crept in and you are challenging the catastrophizing but it’s all going pear-shaped on you just the same and you’re doing the self-affirmations and the positive thinking and all of that stuff but it’s all going to shit as you watch and you’re catastrophizing the challenge and you’ve gone all black and white about the thinking and it’s all going to shit as you watch. So you know that thing, right? Please tell me you know that thing….

 

 

 

 

 

 

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