Working Hypothesis

Life’s a funny old thing. I mean, what’s it all about – right? What’s it all about, huh? Suppose for example you happen to identify with a morose, self-pitying ego and you go around the place whining and whinging and being miserable and life very quickly becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy for you. That can happen you know! It can happen very easily. So you go around the place being all morose and bitter and self-pitying and then the next thing is that you die. So what’s that at all about? Just what the hell was all that about? I mean, wouldn’t you think that just before you croak? Wouldn’t you think, “Well, what the hell was all that about?’ Of course you would. Damn right you would, and I wouldn’t blame you one bit…


So that’s the story. You have to think about these things, you see. You have to. Otherwise you’d go around the place like a total gobshyte mouthing off like a fool the whole time and making a complete knob-end of yourself. Talking shyte all the time. But wait – isn’t that exactly what we do do? Now that I come to think about it… Oh dear oh dear yes. That a pretty accurate picture of what us all, isn’t it? Startlingly accurate I would say. Very accurate indeed. That’s the human race right there – what need is there to say more? What need indeed my friends. What need indeed. We might as well say it like it is, don’t you think? Call a spade a spade, and all that type of crap.


The thing that gets me though is that we all take ourselves so bloody seriously! That’s the sickener for me and I don’t mind admitting it! That’s what sticks in my throat. I mean, just take a good look around you, for God’s sake! Have you noticed how stupidly pompous everyone is? What a stupid bunch of pricks, huh? For God’s sake. The dumb pretentious fuckers! Are we supposed to be taken in by that shit? Are we supposed to fall for that? Is it supposed to impress us?


I’m not just talking about so-called ‘important’ people, you understand. We all know that so-called ‘important people’ are pricks! No surprise there, no surprise there. I think we all have that one figured out! No, I’m talking about Joe Soap here, I’m talking about the man in the street. It doesn’t matter what your social rank, it doesn’t matter what your societal status might be. We’re all taking ourselves too seriously.


Just by way of example, the other day I was sitting waiting for a haircut and there was this young guy having a haircut and he was so damn particular about it. He was saying “No, no, no – I want this bit like that, and I want that bit like this…’ Like it really mattered. You can imagine it for yourselves. You know the story. Anyway I wanted to go up to him and say “Look mate – you’re a world-class twat and no matter what way you have your hair done it’s not going make any difference! You’re still going to be a world-class twat when you walk out of here! Do you actually get that? Do you actually get what I’m saying here?”


Okay, maybe it sounds like I’m being a bit harsh on the guy but I’m only using him to make a point. We’re all like that – he only learned to be the way he is by copying the rest of us so we can’t really blame him, can we? Poor guy – what chance did he have? What chance did he have being born into a fucked-up society like ours! What chance did he ever have about turning into a total twat? Take our obsession with clothes for example. Did you ever see the like of it? People are so serious about their clothes; it’s as if the right choice in attire can somehow redeem the poor benighted idiot that’s wearing it! That’s our ‘working hypothesis,’ so to speak. That’s our working hypothesis and we’re running with it….








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