A conditioned reality had been created for me and I was to move in immediately. All the appropriate forms had been filled in, all the required emails had been sent, all the necessary telephone calls had been made, and so on. This was a very exciting time for me, of course – I could hardly wait. I could hardly wait. It was a custom-made conditioned reality so I knew I would get on great there. It had all the things that I liked and none of the things that I didn’t like. I had written a very long list of all the things that I didn’t like and I had been promised that none of them would be in it!
‘All of the things I like, none of the things I don’t like, all of the things I like and none of the things I don’t like…,’ I kept saying. Intimations of wonderful things came to my mind unbidden and then drifted slowly out again. I wasn’t sure if I had made up or not. ‘Great things are so great aren’t they?’ I said to myself. ‘Wonderful things are so wonderful. Wonderful things are so wonderful and great things are so great.’ My mind was monotonously marvelling over this fact, obsessing over this fact, and the more I obsessed and marvelled the better everything seemed! All of the things I like, none of the things I don’t like,’ I repeated to myself. It was my little mantra.
My friends were all very sceptical, of course. ‘Well, what kind of things will the conditioned reality have in it?’ they asked. I wasn’t entirely sure but I was wasn’t going to admit this to anyone! ‘Well,’ I replied thoughtfully, ‘there the leather sofas and IKEA lighting and tasteful pictures on the wall, and there will be coffee tables dotted here and there with interesting books laid out on them. The air will be very fresh and fragrant and there will be lots of houseplants. Possibly there will be a large aquarium on one of the bigger tables with exotic fish tropical fish swimming about in it. Siamese fighting fish and neon tetras.
I was warming to my subject and my description of the conditioned reality that I was about to move into was becoming ever more detailed – ‘yes and it will have all of these bright purple squeezy balls embedding in the walls and when you squidge them a musical note will sound and anything you want to immediately come into existence via a special type of multidimensional port. All sorts of wonderful things will come into existence, more wonderful than you could ever possibly imagine! There will be lots and lots of very good things and never any crappy or dull or rubbishy things. Everything will be so great and so wonderful and it’ll be super-cool there…’
My friends were staring at me in frank disbelief at this stage. ‘That’s not a conditioned reality you are talking about, you fool,’ one of my so-called friends told me scornfully, ‘that’s just a pathetic lame-ass fantasy! That’s just the very same pathetic lame-ass dumb fantasy that you always come out with…’