Here’s The Thing…

Here’s the thing, I quip, as snug as a bug in my very own hallucination. Here’s the thing, here’s the thing… Here’s the thing, here’s the thing, here’s the thing. Just let us suppose something, just for the sake, just for the sake of supposing! Suppose, suppose, suppose. It’s all just supposing anyway, so there’s no need to worry! No need at all. There’s no need to worry, no need to fret – not yet, anyway!


I’m a spider now, sitting in the middle of my web. That’s how I see myself anyway – as a big fat old spider sitting right in the middle of its web, winking its little eyes at you.  All eight of them. Winking its eyes, winking its eyes. Waiting for you to pay it a visit…


Just suppose that everything that ever happened to you, everything that ever will happen to you, is just a five minute Tom and Jerry cartoon, over before it even begins. It never really happened at all! Just suppose – just for the sake of supposing, that is – suppose that was IT – suppose that was all it ever was. All it is. All it ever will be. You can see that so clearly – you can see it all in the one go. You can draw a line all the way around it and see it for what it is. It’s just a speeded-up nonsensical cartoon bubble that’s over as soon as it begins. That’s ALL it is – it’s no big deal. It’s nothing, it’s just a stupid blip….


Of course we all know that it’s different when you’re actually in it – it’s very different then of course. It’s super-immersive then. So very immersive, so very immersive. It seems to stretch on forever then, it’s all you can think about. You can’t get beyond it – you can’t see beyond it. You can’t get free from it enough to see beyond it. You’re the stuck fly and it’s the sticky flypaper.


But then suppose you suddenly see it for what it is – you can see that it’s all just a meaningless frenetic ‘blip’, a dumb empty cartoon. All so busy, all so busy – but with nothing in it. It’s not really going anywhere. It’s just like the head on a pint of Guinness, frothing away quietly as you sup it…


Your whole life – everything that ever happened to you, everything you ever thought of, everything you ever feared or hoped for, is only just that ridiculous blip. The dumbest cartoon show ever… You start laughing of course – you see the joke and it’s a rich one. It’s a very rich one. You laugh long and loud – you’re in danger of wetting yourself! You laugh and you laugh. It’s the best joke ever.


Here’s the thing though – you’ll always meet those who will tell you that this frenetic squiggle, this bit of frothy nonsense, this preposterous cartoon ‘blip’ is real and that you should take it very seriously! You’ll spot them approaching you, don’t you worry; you’ll get the measure of them quickly enough. You’ll see them coming – if you have any cop on at all, that is. If you’re in any way alert you’ll smell the badness off them. Just watch out for those fuckers, that’s all I’m saying. Just watch out for them…



Art- Todd Schorr








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