Causing Hysterical Mirth In The God Camp

When we graduate from the larval to the adult stage of this incongruous earthly existence the first thing that happens is that we get assessed by the big assessing machine for our suitability or otherwise for engaging adult-wise in this splendid miserable world. We think that we are being assessed for our glorious individuality but really it’s our generality we’re being graded for. How will I score will I make the grade I wonder will my grade be coarse or fine or medium the most excellent mark of perfect generality is the sublime entitlement of course you are both suitable and highly recommended for the very highest positions of responsibility you’ll end up taking your position on the board of directors the money is big and the responsibility to be whatever we tell you to be is great. The story is a familiar one you have heard it many times before I started off my career as a travelling salesman working on a commission-only basis selling Satan’s lies to the general population it’s all on a ‘need to know’ basis you don’t need to know what plans Satan has for you you only have to buy the product and tick the box to be put on the mailing list for all the future special offers. But suppose you don’t make the grade suppose you end up a loser a failure a freak a misfit a reject in the place where all the rejects go? That’s the other side of the coin of course you might start off stupidly thinking that you were born to be a winner but then when it comes to the crunch you discover that you weren’t your delusions of future success were a joke all for the sake of giving the gods a good laugh at your expense and that’s where you really come in to your own with your ridiculously grandiose and self-centred expectations like some rich ripe fruit to be crushed under foot causing hysterical mirth in the god camp some of the minor deities literally pissing themselves laughing they fall over and piss themselves on the spot shrieking with hysterical laughter and it’s all because of you the gods are getting their money’s worth out of you and that’s no word of a lie the howls and cackles of mirth that come rolling down the slopes of Mount Olympus are fit to split your head asunder you never heard the like of it first they allow you to build up your ego to a preposterous size which happens very easily because that splendidly preposterous ego of yours feeds feverishly on illusion and grows fat on fantasy and then they burst your bubble they squash you like the bug you are. We’re all entertainment for the gods in that respect, wouldn’t you say? We’re all in the same boat and the boat is sinking fast. The more seriously we take ourselves the more they roar with laughter. And if we don’t fail the all-important test, if we don’t turn out to be sad and pathetic self-deceiving losers then the gods laugh all the more! The joke is all the richer then…

 

 

 

 

 

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