If You Have To Ask

I have an uncle down in Dungarvan a male voice said somewhere to my left, and then this voice was immediately followed by a louder and sharper female voice immediately to the right I get it all the time, especially if I’m very tired. ‘What’s reality like?’ I wonder and straightaway I find myself realizing what a terribly sad question this is to be asking. It’s such a very sad question. It’s a deeply sad – if you have to ask it then you know you’re in trouble. If you have to ask it then you know things have gone very badly wrong. Reality’s broken and who’s going to fix it?  The sad thing is that there’s no question of it ever being fixed again. Reality has been shattered into a million million pieces and no one is ever going to be able to glue them back together again. We’re in Humpy Dumpty Land now only we don’t know it. We’re wandering around forever in Humpty Dumpty Land. Such a simple thing to know what reality is like. A child could do it. So simple. What could be simpler? After all, what else is there? What’s to be confused about – that’s all there is. There are no duplicates. We don’t know that we know what reality is like because the question never arises. No need to make an issue of it, no need to get all complicated about it. Why would we need to know that we know what reality it like? This is the Garden and there is only the Garden. There’s nowhere else to be. You can’t be evicted from the Garden because there’s nowhere else to go. There’s no need for anything else – everything is already there. You don’t need to know that you know when you’re in the Garden – you don’t need to check up on yourself. You don’t need to ask yourself questions like the one I just asked myself. Not really expecting an answer of course because no one can tell you. If you have to ask then you’ll never know.  If you knew that you knew what reality was like that wouldn’t be adding something, that would be taking it away. You’d lose everything. You’d lose it all then because you’d be thinking about it. Reality would be lost straightway and you’d never know what you’ve lost. You’d be in Humpty Dumpty Land. There’s only one of it – there’s no need for duplication. There never was another one – there’s one but no second. There never was another. When you don’t know what reality is like then you’re always going to be looking for it somewhere else. You’re always be looking for it but you’ll never find it…





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