In the Dream

brain-scans

I was in the dream. I wasn’t in the dream. I was in the dream. I wasn’t in the dream. It was a dream. It wasn’t a dream. It was a dream. It wasn’t a dream. It was reality. It was a dream. It was reality. It was a dream. I don’t know what it was. It’s a dream it’s reality it’s a dream. It’s a dream but maybe its reality. Maybe it’s a dream. I don’t know what it was. How am I supposed to know?

 

How is anyone supposed to know? How does anyone know anything? What does it mean to know? The idea of knowing makes no sense to me. It makes no sense at all. Knowing. It’s a ridiculous word, a candyfloss word, a bubblegum word. It doesn’t mean a damn. It’s a stupid word. A dumb word. Do you know? Don’t you know? I know, I know, I know. I don’t even know what I’m saying here. I don’t even know what my own thoughts mean. I don’t know what any words mean. Words, words, words. Words like confetti. What do words mean? They don’t mean anything. What does it mean to ‘mean’ something, anyway? It’s all candyfloss, it’s all bubblegum. It doesn’t mean a damn.

 

There is a way we can know, I realized. We can know, we can know things, all sorts of things, but only when we don’t know that we’re in the dream. Only then. Only when we don’t know that we’re dreaming. When we don’t know that we’re in the dream then of course we can know all sorts of things. We can know a whole load of things. It’s amazing how much stuff you can know. Mountains of stuff. If you study long enough at university you can be a professor. A doctor of philosophy. You can have a list of letters after your name as long as your arm. Longer, if you have short arms.

You can have a library of knowledge in your head, reams and reams and reams of knowledge. You can have knowledge coming out of your ears. You can have knowledge coming out of all your orifices and that’s fine, that’s great, just as long as you don’t know that you’re dreaming, just as you don’t see that you’re in the dream. When you do, when you do see that you’re dreaming then that’s the end of it. What’s all your knowledge worth then? What are all these things that you’re supposed to know? What are they? What the hell is it all about? Oh yes, you say, I know this, I know that, I’m an accredited expert in this, I’m an accredited expert in that. But that’s only in the dream. That’s only the dream you’re talking about. That’s just the dream. Just the dream. Just the dream. Just the dream. All just the dream…

 

So then it’s all just candyfloss words again, it’s all just bubblegum. None of it means a damn. None of it means a damn thing. Not a thing. None of it. It’s all just candyfloss. It’s all just bubblegum. Candyfloss, candyfloss, candyfloss. Bubblegum, bubblegum, bubblegum. Thoughts that don’t mean anything. Thoughts that never meant anything. It’s all just confetti blowing in the wind…

 

 

 

 

 

 

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